thisisnotreallyablogforreal
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Girly post, deal with it
Went for a bikini wax yesterday. I’m chatting it up on the table like I usually do and we’re talking about the weather, and men, and she asks me how my shows are going and then she says,
“Ok, so we will have to get a picture”
and then she goes to corner of the room and starts rummaging around in some drawer.
Oh my god is she getting a camera?
“No, no, that’s ok, no picture”
What the hell is going on here? Since when did they start to do before and after shots. Normally I’m not camera shy, but I can’t have pictures of my half waxed genitalia floating around. I know I’m not famous now, but soon I’m going to get over this whole “I respect myself” thing and start sleeping with guys to get jobs and then I’m going to become America’s sweetheart. And at the height of my fame, when I’m BFF’s with Angelina Jolie and were prank calling men and asking them to be our lovers a picture of my crotch is going to end up on page six and I’ll lose all my promotional deals.
To make a long story about a bikini wax short, she didn’t want a picture of my crotch just my head: my headshot, for the bulletin board outside. Fortunately, I’m one of those gals who never leaves home without her comp card, a condom, and some lip gloss, and I quickly pulled out three contrasting poses. Yeah. No. I didn’t have any headshots on me, but don’t you worry, I will give her this eventually.
Dear Jennifer,
I still remember when we first met., seems like yesterday. I remember how scared you looked when I spread open my legs and how you called in all your co-workers to get a look at my unkempt area. I remember how I smiled and explained that money was tight and I had to shave and how I hate shaving down there and how I just kinda let things get a little wild and how happy I was to be here.
And remember how I flipped out when I looked at my newly waxed area in the mirror and saw that you waxed it into a landing pad! LOL! And it wasn’t your fault, it my first time with you, and how you were supposed to know I was a triangle or nothing kind of gal. And you kept saying, “No, it’s so good. It’s thin little line, very sexy” and I was trying to explain to you that although some women dig it, I didn’t feel comfortable having my pubic hair remind me of the airport and how I would rather you just take it all off now. So anyway, I’ve enjoyed our time together and I will always remember you, and our accidental first Brazilian.
Xxooxx, see you soon!
Mindy
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“Ok, so we will have to get a picture”
and then she goes to corner of the room and starts rummaging around in some drawer.
Oh my god is she getting a camera?
“No, no, that’s ok, no picture”
What the hell is going on here? Since when did they start to do before and after shots. Normally I’m not camera shy, but I can’t have pictures of my half waxed genitalia floating around. I know I’m not famous now, but soon I’m going to get over this whole “I respect myself” thing and start sleeping with guys to get jobs and then I’m going to become America’s sweetheart. And at the height of my fame, when I’m BFF’s with Angelina Jolie and were prank calling men and asking them to be our lovers a picture of my crotch is going to end up on page six and I’ll lose all my promotional deals.
To make a long story about a bikini wax short, she didn’t want a picture of my crotch just my head: my headshot, for the bulletin board outside. Fortunately, I’m one of those gals who never leaves home without her comp card, a condom, and some lip gloss, and I quickly pulled out three contrasting poses. Yeah. No. I didn’t have any headshots on me, but don’t you worry, I will give her this eventually.
Dear Jennifer,
I still remember when we first met., seems like yesterday. I remember how scared you looked when I spread open my legs and how you called in all your co-workers to get a look at my unkempt area. I remember how I smiled and explained that money was tight and I had to shave and how I hate shaving down there and how I just kinda let things get a little wild and how happy I was to be here.
And remember how I flipped out when I looked at my newly waxed area in the mirror and saw that you waxed it into a landing pad! LOL! And it wasn’t your fault, it my first time with you, and how you were supposed to know I was a triangle or nothing kind of gal. And you kept saying, “No, it’s so good. It’s thin little line, very sexy” and I was trying to explain to you that although some women dig it, I didn’t feel comfortable having my pubic hair remind me of the airport and how I would rather you just take it all off now. So anyway, I’ve enjoyed our time together and I will always remember you, and our accidental first Brazilian.
Xxooxx, see you soon!
Mindy
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