thisisnotreallyablogforreal

I'm performing on this show. Twice.

As myself doing comedy songs, and again as Leibya Rogers.

Please come, and tell your friends!




Performance Space 122 brings you A Summer Season at Spiegeltent:
featuring the comedy collective Chicks and Giggles.
Monday, August 14 th at 10PM
The line-up features Michelle Buteau, Rachel Feinstein, Jess Wood. Music from Adira Amram Mindy Raf & Free to Be Friends.
Hosted by: Carolyn Castiglia.

Spiegeltent is located: (Fulton Fish Market, Pier 17, South Street Seaport). Tickets are $15 or $10 for P.S. 122 members and may be purchased by calling Spiegeltent at 212-279-4200 (open 12-8 Daily) or online at speigelworld.com

Leibya:(la·bi·a)
Plural of Labium:
1.Any of four folds of tissue of the female external genitalia.

2.A liplike structure, such as that forming the floor of the mouth of certain invertebrates, especially insects.

3.A bi-sexual, vegan, musical poet living in NYC created by Mindy Raf who you should add as a friend on myspace,if you have myspace, so you can get bulletins about her upcoming shows and read her blog and soon listen to her music.


Add Leibya!

-----------------------------------------------

Last week I got this message on my cell phone from my mom who just got of the hospital due to an infection from a previous surgery. This is what she said, or at least this is what I thought I heard:

Mom: Hey Mindy. I'm out of hospital. Everything went fine. The doctor ended up having to sodomize the infection. So, it's all sodomized now and much better. . .

So I called her back:

Me: So what happened? Sodomized? Sodomy mom?
Mom: What? Sodomy . .that's from Rent!
Me: What?
Mom: That song. "To sodomy, it's between God and me, to S&M. La Vie Boheme."
Me: Mom, do you know what sodomy is?
Mom: Um, yes. No. Maybe.
Me: It's anal sex, more or less.
Mom: Oh. Why are we talking about this?
Me: Is it a medical term too?
Mom: Ah, no.
Me: So, what did they do to the infection?
Mom: Oh, ahahahaha, cauterize. They cauterized it.
Me: Oh.

I’m walking home today after deciding to splurge on a foot long Subway sub, and I’m thinking about how much work I’m putting into writing and performing and how little money I’m making and I’m thinking, “god, even 20 bucks right now would be great!” and then I see a 20 dollar bill on the ground! It’s right next to a girl who’s leaning up against a tree talking on her cell phone. So I look down at the bill, cell phone girl then sees me see the bill, and before I can say "get your tacky green eyeshadow covered eyes off my money!" she swoops down and picks up the bill! I give her a ‘i was about to pick that up, that was so rude’ look and she quickly says, “Um sorry that’s mine. I dropped it.”

She walks away still talking on her cell phone, and I walk not far behind her, attempting to use my awesome math skills to figure out how many foot long subs I could have bought for 20 bucks. I guess she doesn’t know I’m behind her because she says,

“Oh my god babe guess what?! I just found 20 dollars on the ground!”

“What a CUNT-TWAT-UGLY BITCH!” I say to myself, just loud enough for the entire block to hear.




Not the girl on the street, but
this image came up when I googled
cunt twat.

Animals LOVE my writing. They really get me.

Hmmm . . .so I'm kind of unemployed. Okay, that's not true. I have a couple part time jobs but I quit one of them before I left for Israel and I need to replace it very soon. So, naturally, I've been hanging out on Craigslist. Here's one of my favorite job posts, with the e-mail I actually sent back just for fun. As long as you have an extra 4 hours to spend every morning looking for a way to make a little cash, you might as well use some of that time to send e-mails to "jobs" you'd NEVER take. Enjoy.


Attractive Female For Strap-On Female Dominance Film
Reply to: phillipbutts@straponnyc.com
Date: 2006-07-16, 7:08PM EDT
New York City's premiere female dominance film maker is seeking an attractive female to star in a female dominance movie to be filmed on Sunday, August 6, 2006.

This is an excellent short-term income opportunity for amateurs who enjoy treating males like crap and who don't have a problem with strapping on a dildo and making males suck it and take it up their asses. Experience is helpful but not necessary.

Applicants should be sincere, punctual, enthusiastic and open-minded. Applicants should be able to verbally abuse and humiliate males, slap males, whip and flog males and, of course, fuck and force feed males with your "girl dicks". Of course, because females rule, you will not be having sex with the males - they are there to service you. You are the star of the film.
Pay for this movie is $400.00.

Dear Mr. Butts,

Hey there! Is that your real name? LOL.

I hope you had a great weekend Sir and...well, this is your lucky day!

My name is Mindy Raf and this e-mail is in response to your craigslist ad looking for an amateur porn actress. That's me! Well actually I'm a total beginner. This would be my first naughty film : ) But I'm a quick learner, totally outgoing, and (if shot at a flattering angle) look really HOT on camera. I'd be perfect for your strap-on film.

I do though, however, have some ground rules. I won't make a man "suck it" nor will I "shove a dildo up [his] ass." I'd be happy to wear a robe or nightie while slapping them lightly, but no whipping or flogging. As I always say, words thrill, hands kill. And about "force [feeding] males with my 'girl dick,' um... no.

I do enjoy treating men like crap and I do think that females rule, and I too think men should service us. So, maybe instead of all the sex/dildo/nude stuff, I could just have a 400 dollar worth cameo where I come in fully clothed and deliver a monologue about girl power, with a mask on. Or maybe it’s just a voice over. You don't even have to put my name in the credits; my paycheck is all the credit I need.

So, let me know. Look forward to working with you,
~Mindy Raf

PS.I have some comedy song videos on my website. You can find them here. One of them is about oral sex. For the right amount of money I'll let you use it in the film.

Sorry. I know I said I would post this week, but it turned into a busy couple of days. I think my lack of posting has widdled this blog down to about 20 loyal readers, 10 of them male stalkers. Oh well. Stalkers are people too, and some of them enjoy going to comedy shows. So...um...wanna see another scary picture of me I just received via e-mail? Of course you do!


As Leibya Rogers: pic by brian van


I think I need to make a website entitled:
I'mnotreallythiscarylookingbutcheckoutsomereallyscarypicuresofme.com

Posting will resume this week.

And while you're reading, you should check out my show schedule and come to a show.
I'll buy you a drink!

*Buy you a drink=give you a hug
(Mindy is very poor right now)